Clumsiness & Flannels: Who Am I?

The Back Row

November 16th, 2015Posted by Brian

Who am I?

I’m a bit crazy. I’m ridiculously clumsy. I’m occasionally witty.

I’m prone to hyperbole. I’m generally confused. I’m filled with anxiety. I’m easily annoyed.

I like wearing flannel with T-shirts. I like hosting radio shows and doing podcasts. I like listening to music.

I want to hang out with my friends more than I do. I want to be more involved at church. I desperately want to be in a relationship.

I’m always afraid that I’m going to upset someone. I’m afraid that I’m going to waste my life. I’m deathly afraid that what I believe is wrong.

Recently, I’ve been struggling with who I am. I find myself embracing strange parts of my life (the clumsiness and the flannels) in an attempt to make myself appear cooler. I guess?

Clumsiness is a weird thing to embrace, but I’m 22 years old, and I’m trying to figure things out. What do I want to do as a career? What do I want to be known for? What do I believe?

​I’ve heard this before, so what I’m repeating to you is nothing new. I started this article with 15 things (coupled in triplets, like a poem or something) that, in some way, define me. But here’s the thing. None of these things actually define me. You know who I am? I’m a Christian. I’m someone that Jesus died for. I have the Holy Spirit in me. Those are the most important things about me. Like John writes:

“But as many as received him, to them He gave power to become the sons of God, even to them that believe on his name” John 1:12

My mind is always racing. I’m always dealing with questions that I can’t necessarily answer. At the same time, I’m trying to think up the ‘next best awesome idea’ so that I don’t have to have a job I hate for the rest of my life. While I think about that, I’m searching for a relationship. The only time my mind stops is when I sleep. As I write this, I realize: I just need to stop. I just need to give up. I’m defined by God. That’s what matters.

So let’s finish this post like we started: with a list.

Who am I?

I’m a child of God.

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